Tyler here, hi-jacking the family blog. Ahhh, just like old times. I feel like the newly crowned high school sophomore, re-entering the halls of the Jr. High and thinking "wow, these kids are tiny", like I'd grown 9" in 3 months, octupled my testosterone level, and grew a full beard. Anyhow, glad to be back...albeit briefly.
Sherri and I discovered a fascinating natural scientific phenomenon a few days ago that we plan on submitting to the World Science Foundation or possibly Nobel. The phenomenon is the affect that gravity has on facial tissue at the lowest possible point of a gnarly trampoline bounce. Imagine the massive strength of the earth's gravitational pull holding onto your jowels like a vice grip as your body hurls upward with incredible force. The effect, known as "Facies Tripudium" or "Trampoline Face" causes the subject to appear to age 80 years or, in some cases, take on physical characteristics of mild retardation.
We present to you Test Subject 1A at the height of his bounce, showing hardly any signs of facial abnormality, excluding teeth of course:
And now Test Subject 1A at the lowest point of his bounce, just as the trampoline springs tighten and the fabric begins to hurl him upward. Note the obvious distortion of facial tissue and possible muscle atrophy:
Test Subject 1A is being constantly monitored for evidence of further, unanticipated effects from the battery of tests. At this point we cannot rule out aggression, laziness, attitude, or hypersensitivity as possible side effects. Inversely, Test Subject 1A could also experience extreme and heightened intelligence, politeness, stunning attractiveness, and general studliness.
We are in the process of planning similar studies with other test subjects. We will keep you informed of our findings. We will also notify everyone when our thesis is published in World Science Weekly and will start another blog documenting our journey to the Nobel Prize, entitled "Going to the Show: Our Journey to the Big House."
Trampoline Face
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7 comments:
I love it, your narration made me laugh my head off!! Can't wait ot see & hear about more studies.
FYI...If you get published in the World Science Weekly that will make two in our family.
I hate when I spell 2 letter words wrong. I meant to say...can't wait to see & hear about more studies. It must be all the cold air I've been breathing.
HA!!! That is tooo funny!!!! Who would have thought!
Test
I have found your hypothesis on concerning the effects of “Facies Tripudium” very enlightening and worthy of being published in Nature, the international weekly journal of science. However, one cannot rule out the Test Subject 1A’s genetic make-up and genomic sequence. In elementary cases of Mendelian inheritance, it is essential that both the father’s and the mother’s phenotype be assessed when examining test subjects. I have personally met the parents of Test Subject 1A and have drawn the conclusion, that in this situation, “Facies Tripudium” is clearly expressed by the father and thus, a small portion is passed on to his progeny. Fortunately the maternal genotype is dominantly expressed in Test Subject 1A and “Facies Tripudium” is only manifested in trampoline related situations.
As a sad side note, the father suffers from the strange and horrifying physical characteristics of this condition. It is so severe that the only scientific term to describe his appearance is Quasi as in Quasimodo. Hopefully, the medical community will discover some sort of cure for this pour soul.
Dr. Nigbur,
Welcome to the blogosphere. If I'd known this would be all it would take to get you to surface, I'd have posted a self-deprecating layup eons ago.
Pearson Family-
I peered through all your flickr pictures & I love them. Sherri your hair is getting so long, I like it. The kiddo's look older since I saw them last & that was only 3 months ago!! Love you all.
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